Subtitles by mutzinjay
What the fuck is that?
Jimmy?
-What's up? -Did l hit something?
What the fuck is that?
Maybe you got a flat?
No.
What the fuck? You better pull over and see.
He's still alive. You piece of shit!
Die, you motherfucker!
Look at me!
As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a gangster.
To me...
...being a gangster was better than being president of the United States.
Even before I went to the cabstand for an after-school job...
...I knew I wanted to be part of them.
It was there that I knew I belonged. To me, it meant being somebody...
...in a neighborhood full of nobodies.
They weren't like anybody else. They did whatever they wanted.
They parked in front of hydrants and never got a ticket.
When they played cards all night...
...nobody ever called the cops.
Tony Stacks. How are you?
Tuddy Cicero.
Could this be the Canarsie Kid?
Tuddy.
Tuddy ran the cabstand and the Bella Vista Pizzeria...
...and other places for his brother, Paul, who was the boss of the neighborhood.
Paulie might have moved slow...
...but it was only because Paulie didn't have to move for anybody.
-lt's your fault. -You started it!
l started it? lt's your fault.
At first my parents loved that I found a job across the street from the house.
My father, who was Irish, was sent to work at the age of 11.
He liked that I got myself a job.
He always used to say that American kids were spoiled lazy.
Henry! Watch how you cross!
Bring back milk!
My mother was happy after she found out the Ciceros...
...came from the same part of Sicily as she did. To my mother...
...that was the answer to all her prayers.
I was the luckiest kid in the world.
I could go anywhere, do anything.
I knew everybody, and everybody knew me.
Wiseguys would pull up and Tuddy would let me park their Cadillacs.
Here I am, this little kid, I can't even see over the steering wheel...
...and I'm parking Cadillacs.
But, it wasn't too long...
...before my parents changed their minds about my job at the cabstand.
For them, it was supposed to be a part-time job. But for me...
...it was definitely full time.
That's all I wanted to do.
People like my father could never understand, but I was part of something.
I belonged. I was treated like a grown-up.
Tell him 519.
Every day I was learning to score.
A dollar here, a dollar there. I was living in a fantasy.
Did you have a good day at school?
My father was always pissed off.
Pissed that he made such lousy money, that my brother Michael...
...was in a wheelchair.
He was pissed that there were seven of us living in such a tiny house.
Tell me about this.
lt's a letter from school.
lt says you haven't been there in months.
ln months!
You're a bum!
Want to grow up to be a bum?
After a while, he was mostly pissed because I hung around the cabstand.
He knew what went on there.
Every once in a while I'd have to take a beating. But by then, I didn't care.
The way I saw it...
...everybody takes a beating sometime.
l can't make any more deliveries.
What? You'll fuck everything up.
My dad says he'll kill me. Look.
Come with me.
-ls that him there? -No.
-How about him? -No.
-That's the guy-- -Get him.
Excuse me.
-Scumbag. -Come here, you piece of shit.
-Know this kid? -Yeah.
-Know where he lives? -Yeah.
-You deliver mail to his house? -Yeah.
From now on, any letter from school to his house comes directly here.
Understand?
Another letter from school goes to that kid's house...
...in the oven you'll go, head first.
That was it. No more letters from truant officers. No letters from school.
In fact, no more letters from anybody.
After a few weeks, my mother went to the post office to complain.
How could I go to school after that...
...and pledge allegiance and sit through good government bullshit?
Paulie hated phones. He wouldn't have one in his house.
Mickey called. Want me to call him back?
All right, make the call.
He got all his calls second hand. Then you'd have to call the people back.
Got a nickel? Get him on the phone.
There were guys, that's all they did all day, was take care of Paulie's calls.
For a guy who moved all day long...
...Paulie didn't talk to six people. With union problems...
...or a beef in the numbers...
...only the top guys spoke with Paulie about the problem.
Everything was one-on-one. Paulie hated conferences.
He didn't want anybody hearing what he said...
...or anyone listening to what he was being told.
Hundreds of guys depended on him, and he got a piece of everything they made.
It was a tribute, like in the old country, except they were doing it in America.
All they got from Paulie was protection from the guys trying to rip them off.
That's what it's all about. That's what the FBI could never understand.
What Paulie and the Organization does...
...is protect people who can't go to the cops. That's it.
They're like the police department for wiseguys.
People looked at me differently, and they knew I was with somebody.
I didn't have to wait in line at the bakery on Sunday morning for fresh bread.
The owner knew who I was with, and no matter how many people were waiting...
...I was taken care of first.
Our neighbors stopped parking in our driveway, even though we had no car.
At 13...
...I was making more money than most of the grown-ups in the neighborhood.
I had it all.
One day....
One day, some neighborhood kids carried my mother's groceries all the way home.
You know why?
It was out of respect.
What do you think?
Aren't my shoes great?
You look like a gangster.
They shot me. Help!
Henry, shut the door.
That was the first time I had ever seen anyone shot.
Can't have that in here. Jesus Christ!
l can't have that in this joint.
I remember feeling bad about the guy, but also...
...feeling maybe Tuddy was right.
I knew Paulie didn't want anyone dying in the building.
You're a real jerk. You wasted eight fucking aprons on this guy.
What's wrong with you? l got to toughen this kid up.
It was a glorious time.
And wiseguys were all over the place.
It was before Apalachin and before Crazy Joe...
...decided to take on a boss and start a war.
It was when I met the world.
And it was when I first met Jimmy Conway.
He couldn't have been more than 28 or 29 at the time, but he was already a legend.
He'd walk in the door and everybody who worked the roomjust went wild.
He'd give a doorman $100 just for opening the door.
He'd give hundreds to the dealers and the guys who ran the games.
The bartender got $100just for keeping the ice cubes cold.
The lrishman is here to take you Guineas' money.
-Want a drink? -Give me a Seven and Seven.
l'd like you to meet the kid Henry.
How you doin'?
Thank you.
Keep them coming.
Jimmy was one of the most feared guys in the city.
He was first locked up at 11, and doing hits for mob bosses at 16.
Hits never bothered Jimmy. It was business.
But what Jimmy really loved to do... what he really loved to do was steal.
He actually enjoyed it.
Jimmy was the kind of guy who rooted for the bad guys in movies.
Give me your wallet.
You might know who we are, but we know who you are.
He was one of the city's biggest hijackers...
...of booze, cigarettes, razor blades, shrimp and lobsters.
Shrimp and lobsters were best.
They went fast.
Almost all of them were gimmies. Theyjust gave it up, no problem.
They called him Jimmy the Gent.
Help the lady.
Drivers loved him. They used to tip him off...
...about the really good loads. Of course, everybody got a piece.
Thanks, l'll be back for the rest later.
Henry, come here.
Say hello to Tommy.
You're gonna be working together, okay? Help him. Go ahead.
Jimmy, you got anything good?
And when the cops assigned a whole army to stop Jimmy, what did he do?
He made them partners.
l'd complain, but who'd listen?
-What do you need? -Two Luckys.
-Here you go, Henry. -Thanks a lot.
-What do you need? -One Pall Mall.
What are you doing?
-lt's all right. -Says who? Your mother?
How many Pall Malls you need?
-Where'd you get the cigarettes? -Get him out of here.
-lt's okay. -lt's not okay!
-You don't understand. -You don't understand. Store's closed.
-Henry got pinched. -Where?
By the factory.
Henry Hill. The People of the State of New York vs. Henry Hill.
Docket #704162.
Yes, sir. That's me.
Just stand there. Now stay there.
Counselor, proceed.
Congratulations.
Here's your graduation present.
-Why? l got pinched. -Everyone does, but you did it right.
-You told them nothing. -l thought you'd be mad.
l'm not mad, l'm proud of you.
You took your first pinch like a man...
...and learned the two greatest things in life.
Look at me.
Never rat on your friends...
...and always keep your mouth shut.
Here he is!
You broke your cherry!
Congratulations!
By the time I grew up, there was 30 billion a year in cargo...
...moving through Idlewild Airport, and we tried to steal every bit of it.
See, we grew up near the airport.
It belonged to Paulie. We had friends and relatives who worked all over it.
They would tip us off about what was coming in and moving out.
If any truckers or airlines gave us trouble...
...Paulie's union people scared them with a strike. It was beautiful.
It was a bigger moneymaker than numbers and Jimmy was in charge.
Whenever we needed money, we'd rob the airport.
To us, it was better than Citibank.
You got a phone? Come on!
Two niggers just stole my truck. Can you fucking believe that shit?
There was Jimmy and Tommy...
...and me.
And there was Anthony Stabile.
Frankie Carbone.
And then there was Mo Black's brother, Fat Andy.
And his guys, Frankie the Wop...
...and Freddy No Nose.
And then there was Pete the Killer, who was Sally Balls' brother.
Then you had Nickey Eyes...
...and Mikey Franzese.
Jimmy Two-Times, nicknamed because he said everything twice.
l'll get the papers, get the papers.
What is this? Coats? l need suits, Henry, not coats.
Suits are up on Thursday.
But it's the middle of summer. What'll l do with fur coats?
You don't want furs? l'll take them away.
No, l want them. We'll hang them in the freezer with the meat.
For us, to live any other way was nuts.
To us, those goody-good people who worked shitty jobs for bum paychecks...
...and took the subway to work and worried about bills, were dead.
They were suckers. They had no balls.
If we wanted something, wejust took it.
If anyone complained twice, they got hit so bad they never complained again.
It was alljust routine. You didn't even think about it.
Frankie, what the fuck does 520...
...have to do with 469?
520 ain't even close to 469. What's that got to do with anything?
Piece of cake. Don't worry about the alarms. l just got to get a key.
-No problems? -l'll take care of it.
-Tell him what you were telling me. -Too good to be true.
Big score coming from Air France. Bags of money coming in.
Americans change their money over into French money and send it back here.
-Calm down. -lt's beautiful.
lt's totally, totally untraceable.
Our only problem is getting a key, but l got a plan.
-Me and Frenchy and this citizen. -Yeah, he's a piece of work.
lf l'm right, there could be half a mil coming in, all cash.
The best time is probably over a weekend. So maybe Saturday night.
There's a Jewish holiday Monday. They won't find out until Tuesday. Beautiful.
What about the security?
Security?
You're looking at it. lt's a joke. l'm the midnight-to-eight man.
He just comes in like he's picking up lost baggage.
-lt's beautiful. -lt won't be a problem at all.
-Good. -We're on.
What's really funny is that fucking bank job in Secaucus.
l'm in the weeds lying down.
He said, "What are you doing?" l said, "Resting."
"Here?"
"This ain't no beach or park." "l'm resting! " l said.
He pulls me in, starts asking questions. You know, this and that.
"What are you going to tell us?" l said, "My usual. Nothing."
"Why tell you?" The fuck. He says, "No, you'll tell me something today."
l said, "Okay, go fuck your mother."
You saw the paper, Anthony. My head was out like this.
l'm coming around and who do l see in front of me?
This prick again. He says, "What do you want to tell me now?"
l said, "What are you doing here? l said to go fuck your mother."
l thought he'd shit.
The fuckers. l wish l was big just once.
Funny. You're really funny.
What do you mean, l'm funny?
lt's funny, you know. lt's a good story.
You're a funny guy.
You mean the way l talk? What?
lt's just, you know. You're just funny.
You know, the way you tell the story.
Funny how? What's funny about it?
-Tommy, you got it all wrong. -Anthony--
He's a big boy. He knows what he said. Funny, how?
Just, you know. You're funny.
Let me understand this.
Maybe l'm a little fucked up.
But, l'm funny, how? Funny like a clown? l amuse you?
l make you laugh? l'm here to fucking amuse you?
What do you mean, funny? How am l funny?
You know, how you tell a story.
No, l don't know. You said it. You said l'm funny.
How am l funny? What the fuck is so funny about me?
Tell me what's funny!
Get the fuck out of here, Tommy.
Motherfucker! l almost had him!
You stuttering prick, you!
Frankie, was he shaking?
l wonder about you sometimes, Henry. You may fold under questioning!
What's with you? l thought l was getting pinched already.
He's on my neck like a vulture. What do you want?
This guy didn't want to give you the check.
Could you take care of this?
No problem. Tell him to put it on my tab.
That's what l want to talk to you about.
lt ain't just this one. lt's seven big ones you owe me.
$7,000, that ain't peanuts. l don't mean to be out of order--
lt's good you don't like to be out of order, Sonny.
Embarrassing me in front of my friends, like l'm a deadbeat.
You're a mutt. You know the money we spend in this fucking--
-Don't be like that. -Like what?
Do you believe this prick?
You think this is funny?
What the fuck are you looking at? You fucking moron!
You don't want to bring the check?
Do you believe this prick?
You're supposed to be doing this stuff, too.
You're a funny guy.
That's it, Henry!
You want to laugh? This prick asked me to christen his kid.
l charged him $7,000.
You really are a funny guy.
l'm worried. l'm hearing bad things.
He treats me like l'm a fucking fag.
l got to go on the lam to get away from this guy.
This ain't right. l can't go here or there.
l talk to them a million times. They don't listen.
lf you tell him, he'll stop. l'll wind up being declared M.l.A.
They'll find me in a car in the weeds.
You've known this Tommy all your life.
This cocksucker's an arch criminal.
When l leave my house in the morning l look over both shoulders.
This is no way to live. l'm no fence jumper.
-Tell me what to do, l'll do it. -What could l do?
lf there was something l could do, l would. l'd like to help you out.
Tell him what we talked about.
Maybe you could come in with me, take a piece of this joint. lt'd be good.
What are you talking about?
You mean the restaurant?
lt's a classy place.
You've been in here a million times.
Tommy taking over this joint is like putting a silk hat on a pig.
l don't mean any disrespect, but that's the way it is.
l'm begging you. What can l say?
What am l going to do? What does he want from me?
l don't know anything about the restaurant business.
All l know is how to sit down and order a meal.
Not for you. Just a place to hang.
The chef is great. The shows are good. There's a lot of whores coming in.
What do you want from me?
Tommy's a bad seed. What am l supposed to do? Shoot him?
That wouldn't be a bad idea.
l'm sorry l said that. l didn't mean it. lt's just that he's scaring me.
l just need help. Help me, please.
Know anything about the restaurant business?
He knows everything. He's there day and night.
Another fucking few minutes, he could be a stool.
You want me to be your partner?
ls that what you're telling me?
What do you think l'm talking about? Paulie, please.
lt's not even fair.
You don't understand.
You run the joint. Maybe l'll try to help you.
God bless you, Paulie. You've always been fair with me.
Now he's got Paulie as a partner. Any problems, he goes to Paulie.
Trouble with a bill, he goes to Paulie.
Trouble with the cops, deliveries, Tommy...
...he calls Paulie. But now he has to pay Paulie...
...every week no matter what.
"Business is bad? Fuck you, pay me. Had a fire? Fuck you, pay me. "
"The place got hit by lightning? Fuck you, pay me. "
Also, Paulie could do anything. Like run up bills on thejoint's credit.
And why not? Nobody will pay for it anyway.
Take deliveries at the front door and sell it out the back at a discount.
Take a $200 case of booze and sell it for $100.
It doesn't matter. It's all profit.
Then finally, when there's nothing left...
...when you can't borrow another buck from the bank...
...you bust thejoint out. You light a match.
Do you need help reaching anything?
You look like you're decorating a Christmas tree.
She's from the Five Towns.
Who?
The Jew broad. Diane.
l been trying to bang her for a month. She won't go out with me alone.
-No. -No, what?
No, what? Who asked you anything?
Wait to hear what l'm going to say.
All right, what?
She won't go out with ltalians alone. She's prejudiced against ltalians.
You fucking believe that? ln this day and age? What is this world coming to?
l can't believe this. A Jew broad, prejudiced against ltalians.
She won't go out without her girlfriend. So you come along for her friend.
See? l knew it. l knew it.
What the fuck is wrong with that?
-When is it? -Tomorrow night.
l'm meeting Tuddy.
You could meet Tuddy. Come early and then go.
-Why do you always do this? -Don't give me that shit.
What did l ask you for? A favor. l do a lot of fucking favors for you.
l'm trying to bang this broad. Help me out.
l don't understand you. She's beautiful!
Her family lives in the Five Towns. These Jews got money.
Maybe the family owns the whole block. You may wind up with a big score.
You with your fucking mouth!
I had a meeting with Tuddy at 11:00 and here I am a backup guy for Tommy.
Did you have enough to eat?
lt was delicious. l'm just watching my diet.
Let me watch your figure.
I couldn't wait to go. I was ordering dessert when they were eating dinner.
When they were having coffee, I was asking for the check.
Have some coffee. lt'll wake you up.
Joe, can we have the check?
What are you doing?
-l got to go. -We just got here.
l got that thing.
We'll leave together.
This way we don't go out like a bunch of hobos, one at a time.
I couldn't stand him.
I thought he was really obnoxious. He kept fidgeting around.
You don't mind, do you? That's very annoying.
Good? You might prefer Manischewitz, but it'd look funny on my table.
-Ready? -Lighten up.
We just got here. What are you doing?
Before it was time to go, he was pushing me into the car...
...then pulling me out. It was ridiculous.
Diane and Tommy made us promise to meet them again on Friday.
We agreed.
But when Friday came around, Henry stood me up.
l feel terrible. l don't know where he is.
He really liked you. All he did was talk about her.
We were a trio instead of a double date.
He should have called. l hope it's nothing serious.
But I made Tommy take me looking for him.
Tommy, what the fuck?
You got some nerve standing me up.
Nobody does that to me.
Who do you think you are, Frankie Valli or some big shot?
l forgot. l thought it was next week.
lt was this Friday and you agreed, so you're a liar!
We can talk about this.
Talk to you after what you just did to me?
Forget it.
l thought you would stand me up. You looked bored. You didn't say anything.
Let me make it up to you.
l'll think about it.
I remember, she was screaming on the street and I mean loud.
-But she looked good. -l'll think about it.
But it'll cost you, Hill. A lot.
She had these great eyes just like Liz Taylor's.
Hello, Henry.
-Ready? -Yeah.
Come on.
-Wait a minute. -What?
You have to cover that cross. My mother sees that--
Mom.
Meet my friend, Henry Hill.
My daughter says you're half Jewish.
lt's just the good half.
See you later.
You're leaving your car?
He watches the car for me.
lt's easier than leaving it at a garage.
lt's a lot quicker that way.
l like going in this way. lt's better than waiting in line.
How are you doin'? What's up? Here you go.
-How are you doin', Gino? -Good. How are you?
Every time l come here, l see you two. Don't you work?
Henry, nice to see you. Hi, how are you?
Anthony, right in the front.
Anything you need, let me know.
Tony, thanks a lot. l appreciate it.
You gave them $20 each.
Henry, this is with Mr. Tony, over there.
-Where? -Over there.
Thanks a lot, Tony.
-What do you do? -What?
-What do you do? -l'm in construction.
They don't feel like you're in construction.
l'm a union delegate.
Ladies and gentlemen...
...the Copacabana is proud to present the king of one-liners...
...Henry Youngman.
How are you all? l'm glad to be here. Take my wife, please.
l take my wife everywhere but she finds her way home.
I said, "Where do you wanna go for our anniversary?"
She said, "Somewhere I've never been before. "
I said, "Try the kitchen. "
Dr. Wellsler is here.
Gave a guy six months to live. Couldn't pay his bill.
Gave him another six months.
I love this crowd.
Air France made me.
We walked out with $420,000 without using a gun.
And we did the right thing. We gave Paulie his tribute.
Sixty thousand.
lt's going to be a good summer.
l'm proud of you. That is a lot of money for a kid like you.
Anybody asks you where you got it, you got it in Vegas playing craps.
Check, sir.
No. You have to sign for it here.
Should l tip him?
-How are you? -Okay. And you?
-Henry, this is Bruce. -Good to meet you.
l'll see you around later.
Do you know him?
Yeah.
He lives across the street.
"Roses are red, my love
"Violets are blue
"Sugar is sweet, my love
"But not as sweet as you"
One night, Bobby Vinton sent us champagne. There was nothing like it.
I didn't think there was anything strange in any of this.
A 21-year-old kid with such connections.
He was an exciting guy.
He was really nice. He introduced me to everybody.
Everybody wanted to be nice to him.
He knew how to handle it.
Don't buy wigs that come off at the wrong time.
Morrie's wigs don't come off!
Even underwater.
And remember, Morrie's wigs are tested against hurricane winds.
Forget about money. You can afford a Morrie wig.
Call me now!
Come in for a personalized fitting.
Morrie, Jimmy's waiting. You're past due.
l've been good to you.
But there's something unreasonable going on here.
Jimmy's being a ball breaker.
Give him 8-to-5 on Cleveland.
l never had to pay the vigorish he demands.
What am l, a schmuck?
You borrowed his money. Pay him.
l didn't agree to three points above the vig.
What are you going to do? Going to fight with Jimmy Conway?
He wants his money. Give him his money and we'll go!
Fuck him!
Fuck him in the ear! Fuck him in the other ear!
Did l ever bust his balls?
l could've dropped a dime a million times.
Don't call the cops. You're talking crazy.
You got money for that commercial!
You don't got my fucking money?
Jimmy, he's gonna pay you.
l'll fucking kill you! Give me the money, cocksucker.
Pay me!
He'll pay, he'll pay.
Morrie's. Who's this? He's here. Jimmy, l'm sorry.
You should be sorry. Don't do it again. Give me the fucking money!
You hear me? Give me the fucking money!
l'll give you.... You've got it, kid. You've got it, believe me.
Karen, slow down.
Where? Stay there. Don't move.
lt's Karen.
What happened?
What happened? Are you all right?
Who did it?
This guy who lives across the street from me that l've known all my life.
He started to touch me. He grabbed me.
l told him to stop. He didn't stop.
l hit him back. And then he got really angry.
He pushed me out of the car.
You sure you're all right?
Why don't you go inside and get yourself together. Clean up.
What do you want, fucko?
l swear on my mother, if you touch her again, you're dead.
Don't shoot.
Hide this. Are you all right? Are you all right?
I know there are women...
...who would have gotten out the minute their boyfriend...
...gave them a gun to hide. But I didn't.
I got to admit the truth: It turned me on.
Mazel tov!
Why don't you be like Henry? He's got a nice girl.
He's settling down now. He's married.
Pretty soon he'll have a nice family.
And you're still bouncing around from girl to girl.
It was like he had two families.
The first time I was introduced to all of them at once, it was crazy.
Paulie and his brothers had lots of sons and nephews.
Almost all of them were named Peter or Paul.
It was unbelievable.
Meet Paulie Jr., my nephew. And this is Petey.
There must have been two dozen Peters and Pauls there...
This is Marie.
...all married to girls named Marie.
She looks ltalian.
And they named all their daughters Marie.
And this is Pete. No, l mean Paulie. l get confused myself.
By the time I had met everybody, I thought I was drunk.
Paulie, you shouldn't have.
Welcome to the family.
Sunday dinner?
So beautiful. l want to cry.
Here's something to help you get started.
-The bag. The bag. -What bag?
The bag with the envelopes in it, all the money.
Don't worry. Nobody's going to steal that here.
He didn't call?
-He's with his friends. -What kind of person doesn't call?
He's a grown-up. He doesn't have to call every five minutes.
A grown-up would get you an apartment.
Don't start. Mom, you're the one who wanted us here.
You're here a month and sometimes l know he doesn't come home at all.